Gratitude

Every night before I go to sleep, I try and take a few moments to count my blessings. I have many reasons to be thankful.

Gratitude is missing in so many people's lives.

Mrs. Cleland's Biased Cut Dress of Satin

Today was a very touching day for me. I decided yesterday I was going to spend the day and visit my parents. As an added bonus, I decided to make chocolate chip cookies and deliver some to my father-in-law and my former brother-in-law's mom.

My father-in-law was not home, so I left the cookies in the side door, so he would have them when he returned from his errands. As I ventured down the street, to drop cookies off to my next recipient, I wondered if she would recognize me.

She opened the door with a smile and I felt compelled to introduce myself. She immediately welcomed me into her home, complimenting my scarf while asking me if I made it. Her eyes lit up as I presented my small gift of cookies and she complimented me on how they looked like they were from a bakery.

She made me feel so welcome in her home, wanting me to take my coat off and stay for awhile. We visited and talked about her son. Conversation with her came naturally as she asked about my children and we talked about her grandchildren.

The longer I stayed, the more comfortable we both felt as she told me of her honeymoon in New York City and spoke of her deceased husband. She showed me her wedding picture and I admired her youthful beauty and biased cut dress of satin, along with her dashingly handsome beau.

We laughed. She cried. We hugged.

She showed me pictures of her children and grandchildren, and like many people her age, expressed the sadness of not seeing them. She cried as she remembered her son who passed away a year and a half ago. I wrapped my arms around her, told her I was so sorry and couldn't imagine the pain she feels in losing a child.

When it was time for me to leave, she thanked me so kindly for coming to see her. I asked if next time I was in town, if I could come and visit her again. She smiled a big smile and said she would like it if I did. I told her next time I would call, in case she needed anything from the store, I would pick it up for her.

She thanked me many times for visiting, and as I walked down the front steps she told me to take care. As I backed out of the drive, she stood in her doorway and waved to me. I smiled and waved back.

As I saw her standing in the doorway, I was thankful for the time we spent together and I smiled as thought of her in her youth with a biased cut dress of satin. I can't wait to see her again.

It is Going to Get Worse, Before It Gets Better

A sound, solid piece of advice.

I am frustrated, angry, hurt, and sad. Logically, I know it will get worse, but it will be better someday.

Whoever came up with the quote didn't take into consideration the order of the wording. Maybe to protect the heart, the quote should be "It will be better, just get through the worst."

Sounds better to me.

Cupid's Arrow

I'm such a romantic. I love all holidays. Any holiday is a good reason to decorate the house. The kids have grown up in an environment where we have celebrated everything from Groundhog Day to the First Day of School.

I have greeted children at the school bus with warm cookies, and boxes of ice cream sandwiches. I have decorated the house and set the breakfast table with fancy dishes for many occasions. However, I secretly like one holiday best.

Valentine's Day.

Maybe it is all the hearts of pink and red. Maybe it is in the twinkling pink lights. It could be the chocolate covered strawberries. Or, maybe, just maybe, it is the belief in true love.

Studying

When Madeline was a freshman in high school, I knew how important it was for her to develop good study skills. I know how difficult it is when your surroundings distract you from the task at hand.

A few weekends before final exams, she and I would go to Panera Bread so she could study. It removed her from an environment where she is distracted by her IPod, phone and computer. It put her in a situation where she could focus only on her school work.

Of course, the tradition has been passed on to Andrew. The two of them studied together this morning. The goal is to do well in school, however the bonus is spending time together.

Reality

I am having such a difficult time coming back to reality. I knew I needed some time away from home, but being away just validated I waited too long.

My Feet Hit the Floor

Reality is slowly setting in. I guess my feet hit the floor. When I look out my window I see the still forest, and not the bright lights and movement of the city.

To be fair, my heart and head do appreciate stillness in my surroundings. I need the peacefulness and tranquility in my life. What I forgot about for all these years is how much I love the vibrant, artistic qualities of a city.

For a few days, I remembered. I remembered, I need both to feel alive.